


Choices

by Th3_Morrigan



Category: Dragon Age - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Gen, Hurt, Longing, Regret, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-08
Updated: 2018-01-08
Packaged: 2019-03-02 01:32:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,107
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13307586
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Th3_Morrigan/pseuds/Th3_Morrigan
Summary: The Blight is starting and Duncan has a gut feeling about it. In preparation, he starts bringing in more recruits. One of the potentials was Alistair. But he has to ask his mother first if she will allow him to continue on as a Templar or become a Warden.





	Choices

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah, well, so this happened. 
> 
> Tbh, I'm not much of a Fiona fan, but ever since reading "The Calling" I always felt there was something between Duncan and Fiona. It might have just been me, though.

Duncan had been wandering around the streets of Denerim for over an hour now, no real purpose or destination except to kill time and to clear his mind before his midnight meeting.

This was the first time in a very long time that he would be seeing her again.

He had sent her a letter, just like he usually did when there was news to tell. He knew she wasn't a Warden any more, but he knew news still interested her.  She rarely responded to his letters lately, which was why he was surprised to get a response now. He just wasn't sure which news prompted her to.

He had told her about the scouts reports of the increasing number of darkspawn sightings on the surface, and how the Wardens were becoming alarmed. He told her about his dreams of the archdemon and how he felt more and more that this was going to be a true Blight.

He also relayed news about her son.  He was doing well with his training at the monastery, but the time had come for his induction, and Duncan had made a decision.

She did send him back letters from time to time, but as the years went by they became more rare, and none of them had been like this.

_"Denerim marketplace, midnight, 14th Kingsway."_

Short and curt, not even a hello a farewell or a blessing. He couldn't tell if she was angry or a worried. Well, he would know soon enough.

The midnight bell began to toll just as he rounded the corner of an alley into the marketplace. The massive tent in the middle was dark and quiet. Duncan slipped into the darkness, making his way quietly through the bare tables that held the merchant's wares when the market was awake. He waited in the middle of the tent, utilizing his stealth to remain hidden in the darkness. It was more out of habit than of caution.

A few minutes passed before a movement to his right caught his attention. He turned and saw her cautiously making her way through the maze of tables under the darkened canopy of the tent. He smiled. She was trying to be stealthy, but she never really could "disappear" like he could. Despite being an elf, her step was heavy and her movements abrupt. She was a mage, after all, not a rogue, but it made him happy to see that she still tried to apply what he taught her even after all these years.

He waited until she was right in front of her before making himself known.

"Your stealth has improved, but not by much."

She startled at the sound of his voice and instinctively raised her hand.

Duncan caught it and pointed it up to ward the ceiling. The air around him got cold and there was a crack as a gush of cold wind flew from her hand and froze the canopy above them.

"Don't startle me like that! I could have killed you," she said yanking her hand from his grip.

"It's nice to see you too, Grand Enchanter" Duncan said, unfazed.

There was a moment of awkwardness while they stood there, inches apart, neither one quite knowing what to say next. 

Duncan cleared his throat and stepped back.  "It's been a long while.

"Yes, it certainly has," Fiona said, stepping back as well. 

Duncan could sense she was already having doubts about coming personally. He sighed.  Time hadn't healed it then.  Better to get this over with.  "So, did you come about the Blight or about your son?"

"Perhaps both,"  she said and paused, waiting for Duncan to say something.  He didn't, so she went on.  " Do you really think there's a Blight coming?"

"I know I only have my dreams and increased darkspawn sightings to go on here, but, yes.  I have a gut feeling about this."

"Are you sure it's not…" she had instinctively reached out a hand to him but stopped midway and put her hand back down.  She hoped he hadn't noticed it. "Are you sure it's not just the Calling?"

Duncan sighed.  "Perhaps it is.  Perhaps it's both.  The archdemon, I've seen him in my dreams, and he spoke to me."

"What did he say?"

"He said he was coming for me," Duncan said and shivered.  After all these years, he had gotten used to the nightmares that plagued Wardens, but nothing prepared him for seeing the archdemon in his dreams.  The first night he did, he woke up with a cold sweat and his muscles ached from the tension, as  if he had been running for hours. His head had throbbed, the loud roar of the dragon still ringing in his ears.  Even though he didn't speak their language, he understood what the archdemon said to him.

_"I will burn your land and kill every last one of you.  Watch out, Warden. I'm coming to get you."_

And he laughed a terrible laugh that turned Duncan's blood cold.

Every night for the past month he had the same dream.  He tried not to sleep after the first two weeks but it was impossible to stay awake. He learned to live with it, or at least tried to.  He felt like he had aged ten years since the dream started.

She sensed his disquiet and this time did not stop herself.  She reached out to him and put a reassuring hand on his arm.

Duncan flinched at her touch but did not pull away.  It had been a while since he last received a comforting touch like that and he had missed it.  He felt his resolve crumble around him. Exhaustion of sleepless nights and having to bear these nightmares alone made him start to cry.

The mage, startled by his tears, took him in her arms and held him.  She had seen Duncan this upset and vulnerable only once before. He almost took his own life then. She didn't want him to give up now.

She let him cry. She knew he needed it. When he calmed down, she finally released him.

"Stay strong, Duncan."

He smiled wanly.

"Is there anything I can do?"

He sighed deeply. "Yes. As a matter of fact, I think that's why you came here today."

"You're asking me to give him up?"

Duncan nodded.

"You're asking too much."

"Am I? Would you rather he finish his Templar training? And then what? He'd be assigned to some Circle to watch over mages, his skill reduced to taking down the occasional mage who goes against the rules or beheading a poor innocent soul who couldn't pass his Harrowing? What if he get assigned to track the defectors and apostates?" Despite her high station as Grand Enchanter, he knew her to be sympathetic to the plight of apostates who wanted to just live in peace.

She knew he was going to use that against her and she was not fully swayed.  "And you think running straight for a darkspawn hoard is better?"

"I didn’t say it was, but it would be a better use for his skills, wouldn't you think?"

"He's my son, Duncan."

"Precisely why I don't think he should go on to become a Templar.  Fiona, please see reason.  Alistair is a skilled warrior.  You know I need people like him on my side, especially now."

She was silent. He hoped to the Maker she was beginning to come around.

"I'll make a deal then," Duncan said when she didn't reply. "I won't conscript him unless he says he wants to join. How's that?

Fiona looked at him. He could see she was hopeful.

"You'd give him a choice?"

Duncan nodded. "He hasn't been given the opportunity to make much choices in his life now has he? I suppose it's the least I could do for him... and you."

This struck a chord with Fiona. From the moment she presented Alistair to his father, she had demanded that her son be kept out of politics and the royal court. She didn't want him to end up like Maric, bearing his duties to the throne like a great burden, bereft of happiness.  She didn't want him to grow up with the stigma of being half-elven either, not entirely accepted by either race as one of them, so she decided they would pretend that he was the bastard child of the king and a human servant. She hoped that at least would give him enough freedom to do what he wanted when he grew up.  

But things didn't work out so well. King Maric disappeared and Arl Eaon took him in.  Though he was treated well enough by the old Arl, people around him were not so kind.  He wanted to take up lessons like Cailan, but most of the Arl's court chastised him for being a bastard, and always told him he wouldn't amount to anything. Even the Arl's wife, who suspected him of being Eamon's bastard, refused to have him in the keep, at least when she was around.  It seemed he had developed a stigma of his own.

When the boy was old enough, Eamon shipped him off to the monastery for his Templar training.  At least he would finally get the education he'd wanted, and be out of other people's way.  Fiona blanched when she found out that he was being sent against his will, but there was nothing she could do.  Technically, she had abandoned him to his fate when she left him with his father. Thankfully, Duncan was always there to keep an eye on him. Her fears were quelled when Duncan reported that he had taken to his Templar training and was rather "enjoying it despite the sisters".

Now he was weeks away from becoming a full-fledged Templar.  It was a noble profession, but she had to admit, it wasn't one she would have chosen for him.  But then again, if he was happy…

Fiona closed her eyes and sighed.  Old regrets and old hurts came flooding back.  Is this really what _he_ wants? Would her son have been any happier had she taken Duncan's offer to pretend to be the child's father? Would _she_ have been any happier had she accepted Duncan's love after she decided to leave king Marick? Would they have all been better off?

Duncan touched her shoulder tentatively.  "You do know I think the world of him.  I always have. I'll take good care of him."

Unshed tears were pooing in her eyes when she finally looked up at him.  "Give him a choice, Duncan. And make him proud of himself, whatever he decides."

 

***

 

_5 Drakonis_

 

_Fiona,_

_We have finally arrived at Ostagar and met with King Cailan's forces.  Scouts have reported Darkspawn hoards amassing and heading for the pass.  They estimate the hoard to arrive in a couple of days.  Cailan did a good job of rallying soldiers to fight with us, although I suspect Commander Loghain isn't too happy about it.  He still does not believe this is a true Blight.  We shall see when the hoard comes._

_Alistair is here with me, of course.  He would not stay behind in Denerim. He gets angry like his mother, very loud and brash.  He got into trouble for it.  In the end he got Evers and Paige to convince me. I didn't have much of a choice._

_He is currently in the Wilds. I had put him in charge of the few last-minute recruits I managed to gather, so he is safe, for now._

_The boy is better with a sword than I suspected.  He has taken to our more grueling training like a fish to water.  He revels in the drills we go through every day.  His Templar training has proved useful as well.  He is disciplined and mindful of his surroundings in battle, not to mention the tricks he learned from his previous training.  Very useful to us._

_His father would have been proud.  So would you, I suppose.  I know I am.  He has grown to be a formidable warrior, and I am glad you had allowed him to join our cause.  He is still expressing his gratefulness at being given the chance to be recruited.  I just thought you should know that._

_I should end here. Cailan has summoned me for another meeting to finalize our battle plan.  If all goes well and the archdemon shows his ugly head here, this Blight will be over before long._

_I will send reports dutifully, and I promise I will look after Alistair._

_He means a lot to me, too._

 

_Sincerely,_

_Duncan_

**Author's Note:**

> Come say hi. I'm on [ Tumblr](http://th3morrigan.tumblr.com/)


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